Movie Breakdown: The 33

The Impression:

Back in 2010 a mountain collapsed and trapped a group of Chilean miners underground for a whopping 69 days.  The 33 details their story.

The Reality:

Movies based on famous events are really difficult to pull off.  Everyone knows how they’re going to end!  And let’s face it, if you already know how a film will end, then the only way it’s going to win you over (or be entertaining) is if the journey it takes you on is really damn good.

The 33, even with all of the interesting tidbits that are strewn throughout the real life occurrences that it’s based on, does not feature a really damn good journey.  No, instead of being a concise, tense re-telling of what those Chilean miners went through while stuck deep underground for just over two months, it’s an incoherent film that bumbles along for two hours and doesn’t particularly tell any part of its story well.  Hell, I didn’t even feel claustrophobic at all, and that’s just rather baffling when you consider what the movie is about.

Overall, The 33 is too unfocused, too dramatic and too long.  There’s definitely a great story buried (ha) somewhere in it, but director Patricia Riggen just didn’t have it in her to dig (ha) it up for the world to see.  Only watch The 33 if you really love Antonio Banderas (his character Mario is the only thing I legit liked in the movie) or if by chance you’ve been hankering for an uninspired, paint by numbers look at what all of those miners and their families went through a number of years ago.

The Lesson:

33 minors stuck in a Chili’s would have made for a much more interesting movie.  Someone make it already so that I can watch it and remember what it’s like to feel awake.