For the
sake of not having to write the same intro a million
different ways throughout the rest of time, just know that
this column avoids the overly long and sometimes dull
process of full film reviews and instead opts to break
things down based on what I thought going in, what happened
while I was there and what I learned at the end of it all.
Thanks for reading!
The
Breakdown - The Dilemma
The Impression:
Ron Howard takes a break from counting his massive piles of
money to try to dip his wand back in to the "adult comedy"
of past hits like Parenthood. Seeing as the
powers-that-be dumped a new Ron Howard film in to the
cesspool that is early January, I can only imagine that
The Dilemma isn’t quite up to snuff.
The Reality:
In the first moment of The Dilemma, Geneva (Winona
Ryder’s cuckcolding character) asks her husband (Kevin
James), and two best friends (Vince Vaughn and Jennifer
Connelly) "When do you really know somebody?" Without
context or pretense, just blatantly asks the sort of stupid
question that would have me stand up and leave a dinner
table. And it sets the stage for the rest of this insipid,
mean-spirited comedy. Turns out old Geneva is banging a
tattooed bro named Zip (Channing Tatum in one of the few
bright spots in the film) and by accident Ronnie (Vince
Vaughn) catches them locking lips and the sheer weight of
should-he or shouldn’t-he tell his best friend, sends him
down a spiral of inanity that leads to more and more
ridiculous set-pieces. Every character in this film is
entirely unlikable. It feels as if Ron Howard wants to say
something about the secrets we keep as adults and the way
that they can tear us apart inside and out, but his
characters just turn out to be simpering idiots who are
barely nice to each other. Aside from Ronnie (every Vince
Vaughn tic rehashed, with just a dash of maturity thrown
in), there isn’t a solidly written character in the film,
each just a knitted together hodgepodge of shoddy traits.
More so, even after garnering so much flack for a line about
electric cars being "gay", the film still manages to be
borderline offensive, the lengthy soliloquy about "gay"
things being equaled if not trumped by a series of jokes
aimed at Asians.
The Lesson:
Ron Howard has made the leap from talented director with a
habit for bad choices to mediocre director whom occasionally
picks a decent film.
- Noah Sanders
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